|Yes, somehow, Johnny Gargano is still alive.|
Sunday, May 21, 2017
Friday, May 19, 2017
Thursday, May 18, 2017
|Juvenile, but effective.|
|OK, Arrow. We're good.|
|Still funny. Not sure how, but still funny.|
Wednesday, May 17, 2017
|Coincidentally, I, too, am also on board 100%.|
If I actually believed The Flash killed off Iris West for good in this episode, I would give them weird, backhanded credit for the swerve - spending the entire back half of the season with the team doing everything in their power to stop a tragedy but none of it worked because they suck at their jobs and are frequently very stupid.
|Who would have thought a relationship that started with so much gay panic would end so tragically?|
Sunday, May 14, 2017
Saturday, May 13, 2017
Yep, that certainly was an episode of Arrow. I mean, if you have an episode that pretends to be a climax despite clear clues in previous episodes that it's not the climax and also there's two episodes left in the season so clearly it's not a climax, how can it not be anticlimactic?
|Not even the power couple of the episode.|
Thursday, May 11, 2017
|The Monster Among Men has a booboo.|
Oh, technically, Cesaro and Sheamus are now officially challenging the Hardy's for the tag titles, but we all knew that was gonna happen. And technically, Golden Truth had a failed redemption storyline that will probably lead to their retirement or breakup, but who gives a shit?
On Smackdown, Kevin Owens cut a great promo, another edition of The Fashion Files made me laugh despite my better judgment, and Nakamura Vs. Ziggler is official for Backlash, but we all knew that was gonna happen anyway.
Everything else was water-treading and time-wasting. I'm not sure if it's because these were UK shows, taped in advance, or because of the uncertainty (in the case of Raw) caused by Braun Strowman's injury, but both shows were complete nothingburgers.
Tuesday, May 9, 2017
Sunday, May 7, 2017
Saturday, May 6, 2017
|NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.|
|Hooray for metaphors indeed!|
Thursday, May 4, 2017
Instead, I'm just going to wonder why I should give a fuck? How does Savitar being Barry really change anything? It'll probably factor into the eventual resolution, and hell, I'll go out on a limb right now and say those shots of them filming a funeral that leaked a couple weeks ago were probably filming Future SaviBarry's funeral or something dumb like that.
But beyond that, I don't care. They clearly meant us to care. They clearly thought they were setting up a big mystery and we were all going to be excited for an exact duplicate of Who Is The Evel Speedster Going To Be Actually, but nope. Don't care. Stopped caring about Savitar the instant his mystery identity became A Thing, in fact. Seen it all before.
Which is true of pretty much every characte beat in this episode, espeically the Joe-Cecille story. Retread city. Truns out Joe was telling lies and keeping things from her to protect her but decided that love was important. This lesson was new to him because he does not watch The Flash.
The funny thing is that by Flash standards, the baseline craft of the episode was pretty good. Cisco carried the bulk of the (over)acting and melodrama, and he can pull it off. The new scientist was good even if she seemed to be transported right out of an 80's movie. I'm not sure Iris even spoke a line of dialogue. There weren't many dumb arguments. But the season story is now officially a bigger mess than ever and I just want it to be over because they promise Season 4 won't be about evil speedsters. They haven't ruled out the other two things they suck at - time travel and alternate Earths - but ruling out one of the show's three weak points can't be all bad.
Tuesday, May 2, 2017
Monday, May 1, 2017
Iron Fist leaps to sorta OK with two episodes left to go in the season, A lot of stuff happens, but it's sort of introduced and sort of resolved over the span of these two episodes, so it's too little, too late. Also, I still don't know what's going to be in the last two episodes.
|Now that's some branding.|
Pre-Show: Enzo & Cass vs. Anderson & Gallows: I'm gonna flip a coin and say Enzo and Cass win.
And hey, I won the coin flip. You've seen this match a few times before, but it was well eecuted except for some poor distance judging on one failed tag attempt. Anzo got a rollup on I think Anderson after Cass booted Gallows out of the Magic Killer position. (1/1)
US Championship: Kevin Owens vs. Chris Jericho:Owens wins, pussibly retiring Jericho for another nine months or so.
Or not! Either I've been worked by the rumors and Jericho's sticking around, or whatever happens to send him off and get the title off him will happen on Raw or Smackdown. Pretty good match with a great ending playing off Owens' finger moment at Mania. Also, both Jericho and Owens have new entrance graphics, and Owens' is AMAZING. (1/2)
Neville vs. Austin Aries, Cruiserweight Championship: Neville retains.
I said "retains", not "wins", so this is a correct prediction. Hot match, hot crowd, lots of great sequences, and it ended with Neville using the ref to break the Last Chancery to lose by disqualification and retain the title. Since the next Raw PPV is Extreme Rules, expect some kind of stipulation and an Aries victory. (2/3)
The Hardys vs. Cesaro and Sheamus, Raw Tag Championship: I'll go out on a limb and say Cesaro and Sheamus take the belts and break the hardyz.
Nope! In fact, they went the other way with it, and turned Cesaro and Sheamus heel. I don't know if this is because The Revival are out of action or what. Not a fan of the decision, because I don't think Cesaro makes a great heel and Sheamus as a heel is old as fuck. Maybe this will be what "breaks" the Hardys since Broken Hardys is gonna get face reactions? This is probably slso setting up a gimmick rematch for Extreme Rules. (2/4)
Bayley vs. Alexa Bliss, Raw Women's Championship: Bayley retains.
Wow. How much does WWE like people losing in their hometowns? So much so that Alexa won clean, for no real reason or continuation of the story, or any angle involving Sasha. Good for Alexa, who becomes the first woman to win belts on both shows, and a good, intense match, but I'm not sure there's any thought going into the women's division beyond that. (2/5)
Bray Wyatt vs. Randy Orton, House of Horrors Match: That's all I need to bet against Randy Orton out of pure spite. Wyatt wins.
And indeed he does, but not before we're subjected to one of the dumbest fucking things I've ever seen - Randy Orton acting like he's in a direct to video horror movie. And the second dumbest thing I've ever seen, the rest of this stupid pile of garbage. Basically a hardcore match in a badly dressed, badly lit house some distance away from the arena, pre-taped and edited with spooky inserts and I think maybe even foleyed with punch sounds Or it's just how they were miked. Orton yells "WHERE YOU AT" like four thousand times..
Wyatt dumps a fridgeon Orton, crawls out to a car, and asks the driver to drive him to the arena, and the match takes a break for Rollins/Joe?! What the fuck? After a limo ride that lasts, convenienly, the length of Rollins-Joe plus one ad for the WWE Network, Wyatt arrives in the arena and does his entrance. And Randy Orton is here, somehow, having escaped from underneath the fridge and having called a fast Uber, I can only assume.Then we get a Singh Brothers run-in, two Jinder Mahal belt shots to the back of Orton's head, and a Sister Abigail to finish it. What a mess. , (3/6)
Seth Rollins vs. Samoa Joe: Joe wins through shenanigans and we get six more weeks of this.
I freely admit this was distracting, coming as it did in the middle of another match and all. Also, who cares, and also, the House of Horrors break murdered the crowd, and this isn't the match to get them back. Low stakes, not much build, and while I like JOe and am happy to see him getting the big money on the big stage in the back half of his career, the fact is that Joe's basically had one gear and wrestled one match since he joined WWE. And Rollins is right in line with frequent Joe opponents like Balor and Nakamura, which doesn't help. They put the work in, but don't get much out of it. Rollns won with a weird fluke cover, so I don't know what or why any of this match. (3/7)
Roman Reigns vs. Braun Strowman: I'm gonna say Strowman wins but the victory will be blamed on Roman's ambulance injuries.
Yep. Of course, even with Roman's "injuries", indicated by a heavily taped up chest and arm, it took a hellacious beating and two running powerslams to keep Reigns down because Reigns. Post-match, Strowman destroys Reigns a bit more with the steel steps, so it might be another couple of weeks before Reigns is back to 100%. Reigns refuses to be stretchered out, either out of bravery, fortitude, or fear that Strowman would ambulance-murder him again. Which in fact happens at the start of Raw Talk after the PPV - Strowman charges at Reigns who's getting into the back of the ambulance, knocks the back door off, and Reigns somehow manages to get the last hits in. Because Reigns. (4/8)
Saturday, April 29, 2017
|Yeah I don't need to watch this live.|
Friday, April 28, 2017
|There's moral ambiguity, and then there's just amibuity.|
Thursday, April 27, 2017
Another solid episode of Agents of SHIELD in the can, but it pretty much played out in a completely logical fashion from what came before it, so I'll touch on a couple of minor points instead of the plot.
Wednesday, April 26, 2017
|NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO|
|Can this just keep happening forever?|
Sunday, April 23, 2017
Yeah, they wish many fractures had blessings, because that episode was fractured as fuck. It was jacked up. It was the single biggest dumpster fire of the show to date, which is saying something.
Saturday, April 22, 2017
|Ten! Ten! Ten losses, one win!|
Good news, everyone! NXT has a new theme, and has gone from having the best theme (I know, low bar) of all the WWE shows to the worst. It's fucking awful. It's like Kid Rock's cousin fucked a Hot Topic dumpster.
Thursday, April 20, 2017
|Best Thing on a Bad Episode|
Brian Kendrick and Akira Tozawa have been the best thing on 205 Live for a while now, and one of the best things in all of WWE. Until two weeks ago, Kendrick had been teaching Tozawa a series of heel "lessons" that involved Tozawa getting fooled or beaten up.
So, three episodes ago, the tables turned, with Tozawa beating Kendrick by faking a knee injury, then tricking Kendrick into losing to Mustafa Ali by sneaking in and ringing the ring bell to make Kendrick drop his submission before Ali tapped. It's a great story, and that's why I'm giving this week's sub-par installment a pass, because Tozawa distracting Kendrick so Tony Nese could hit Kendrick from behind over Kendrick costing Nese the match with Tozawa is not the best or most logical way to play out the "have eyes in the back of your head" lesson.
In other news, I think, hope, pray that the Noam Dar / Rich Swann / Alicia Fox thing is over, as this week saw Fox dump Dar and Swann reveal that the whole thing was just revenge on Fox for dumping Cedric Alexander. Go, angle, and never darken my door again.
Drew Gulak continues his quest to stop dangerous high-flying on the dangerous high-flying show, and now he has a protest sign and a bullhorn because I guess CJ Parker hasn't needed them for a year and a half so let's try this again, folks!
Oh, almost forgot. TJ Perkins is evil now. He got Sithed by Neville a week or two ago. He's helping beat up Austin Aries before the rematch at Payback. If you're feeling neither positively nore negatively towards this news, that's appropriate.
|OK, I guess?|
We all know Randy Orton's going to retain, assuming the Payback match is even for the title anymore, which I guess it is but they never mention it. So none of the three faces in the match (Sami Zayn, Luke Harper, or Mojo Fucking Rawley) were going to win. That left Dolph Ziggler (nope), Jinder Mahal (what), and Erick Rowan as the heels. I figured it'd go to Rowan to follow on with the Wyatt Family thing, but no, thanks to the help of the maybe called up, maybe guest starring Bollywood Boyz, Jinder Mahal earned the right to lose to Orton at Backlash in May.
Now, I could get behind this. An Indian heel stable with Mahal at the helm? There are worse ideas. ANd WWE implemented two of them. First, by having Mahal call himself "THE MAHARAJA", because really, WWE? And second, having him be from a rich famil, a trope stolen from generations of Arab wrestlers, some of whom, as you'll see on 205, are apparently still using it. Ugh.
Charlotte, meanwhile, became the #1 contender by beating Naomi clean in a non-title match while the other heels in the SDWD executed Natalya's brilliant plan of staring at her backstage twice. Good plan, Natty, Carmella, and Tamina. That'll really teach her to come in and be better than you.
The Shining Stars are now "The Colons", so I assume when Primo and Epico wrestle in singles matches, they'll be "The Semicolons". ZINGO! Anyway, they beat American Alpha to make us try to forget tje ;ast twp uears pf timeshare-shilling jobbing and it's not really working yet.
Kevin Owens beat Local Talent in a US Title Open Challenge, and in the main event, AJ Styles beat Baron Corbin in a decent match over them being mad at each other from the AUS Title A#1 Contender's match last week. See what I mean about the WWE belt being the midcard belt? And that's it. couple video packages for Nakamura and Dillinger and that somehow filled two hours of show. Not very interestingly.
Wednesday, April 19, 2017
|Yeah, we were due.|
That's because I like a style of racing game that hardly ever gets made anymore. Everything now is a large open world street racing game with some vague plot. And it's online. And there's no local splitscreen. And they want you to, you know, drive.
Saturday, April 15, 2017
|GABBA HEY GABBA HEY CLICK CLICK CLICK HEY|
Wednesday, April 12, 2017
|IMPOLITE AND EVIL!|
Tuesday, April 11, 2017
|OK, fine, I like Braun Strowman now.|
In the fifth episode of Iron Fist, there's a scene, a moment in time, at encapsulates almost everything that's wrong with this show. Later, there's a kinda shitty fight that covers the rest.
Wednesday, April 5, 2017
|TEN! TEN1 TEN! TEN! TEN!|
|And why we turn their movie into a Netflix series.|
|Nope. Nobody likes you.|
Two more epiosdes of Iron Fist in, and I have good news, and I have bad news.
Monday, April 3, 2017
|My favorite Wrestlemania moment.|
Saturday, April 1, 2017
|The Ultimate... Something Or Other|
|Probably the match of the night.|
Friday, March 31, 2017
So, say you're a weekly show in the WWE, with your own roster of a dozen plus wrestlers, and of those dozen plus wrestlers, two of them are performing on Wrestlemania, and those two are competing in the pre-show. How do you fill your last show before the big dance? With filler!
Wednesday, March 29, 2017
|She must be strong, she's wearing black pants.|
Tuesday, March 28, 2017
|What's that slogan again?|
Saturday, March 25, 2017
|Lucyin the front, Ollie in the badk.|
Yesterday, we adopted Lucy and Oliver lrom a local rescuer we found through Feline Rescue MN. Tyey just turned 11 months old, sister and brother, friendly, affectionate, and utterly ridiculous. I won't be clogging this place cat blogging, don't worry, but in the interest of a broader variet of topics, and also because of the hyper focus of the last... 19 hours, I figured I'd indulge.