Sunday, May 20, 2018

Deadpool 2 (No Spoilers)

BREAKOUT STAR. There was a better picture but it was a spoiler.
For the first twenty minutes of Deadpool 2, I was... worried. Concerned, even. Oh, sure, there were moments of pure comedic insanity, but the overall tone seemed... sedate. At least compared to the original, which had its quiet, even serious moments, but it just seemed tonally... off a bit.

Agents of SHIELD:: “The End”

Magical
Even though Agents of SHIELD got picked up for 13 more episodes, next summer, after Infinity War II drops, the season finale could still be seen as the end of the show as we know it.

Arrow: “Life Sentence”

FWIENDSHIP1
The sixth season of Arrow is on the books, and it ended in a way that was satisfying to watch, but didn’t redeem an otherwise awful season.

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wrouindup (May 14-16)

More of this please. Lots more. For a title.
Ah, the periodic European tours. A chance for WWE to pre-tape Raw and SMackdown in front of smarky British crowds, make lots of royal wedding jokes, and estabilsh a few more Money IN The Bank challengers. EVENTS OF SIGNIFICANCE:

Wednesday, May 16, 2018

Jessica Jones: “Freak Accident / Sole Survivor”

Maybe not the stable one?
As much as Jessica Jones Season 2 appears to be about the main character coming to terms with her mysterious past, I’m starting to wonder if the other real story of the seasson isn’t about Trish, and how her ostensibly more stable and successful exterior isn’t hiding some deep dysfunction.

The Flash: “Think Fast”

Oh hey Diggle.
There’s a lot to dislike about the penultimate episode of Flash Season 4.

Summer Of Oldnerd: New Grill

Please ignore the gendered cultural connotations.
Last summer, nothing happened. Nothing happened because the summer was consumed with garage repair. The garage repair meant deck replacement, because the deck sits on top of the garage. Which is super cool most of the time except this one time when it wasn’t.

Sunday, May 13, 2018

Jessica Jones: “AKA Start At The Beginning”

RECONTEXTUALIZED!
With the main series wrapping up their seasons and Luke Cage S2 incoming, it’s time to finally dip into Jessica Jones Season 2.

Agents of SHIELD: “The Force Of Gravity”

It’s funny, for an episode full of important, impressive, or iconic moments, all of the screencaps from this episode are awful and don’t show any of them.

Arrow: “The Ties That Bind“

The Gang’s All Here
Once again, solid execution tries to pull Arrow out of the deep structural flaws of its season, and almost succeeds.

The Flash: “Harry And The Harrisons”No

Oh, just fuck off with this already, Flash.
No, really. Fuck off. Three episodes away from the end of another awful season, and you decide to devote it to Bad Accent Theater.

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wrouindup (May 7-10)

Roman Reigns can’t catch a break?
The theme for the week, and probably the month, is Money In The Bank qualifying matches. We have eight entrants each in the men’s and women’s matches this year, presumably to even things out since they’re dual-brand. EVENTS OF SIGNIFICANCE:

Braun Strowman defeated Kevin Owens to qualify on Raw

Strowman is a lock for this kind of match, a large multiman match where he can lose without losing.

Finn Balor defeated Roman Reigns and Sami Zayn to qualify on Raw

That was a pleasant surprise. I don’t expect Balor to win the briefcase either, but there’s a chance, unlike Strowman. Jinder Mahal interfered and cost Roman Reigns the match sort of, so they’ll be boring the shit out of me at Money In The Bank, I presume.

The Miz defeated Jeff Hardy to qualify on Smackdown

That’s fine. The briefcase always works better on heels than on faces, so The Miz migh end up with it. Especially since I think it’s likely to end up on a Smackdown star. But...

Rusev defeated Daniel Bryan to qualify on Smackdown

I mean, obviously, nobody wants Daniel Bryan in a ladder match. Rusev could also take the briefcase, and I’d certainly love it if he did. And it’s gotta be sort of significant that he was the first person to defeat Bryan since his return, right?

Ember Moon defeated Sasha Banks and Ruby Riott to qualify on Raw

Another pleasant surprise, including a lovely double Eclipse to finish the match.

Charlotte defeated Peyton Royce to qualify on Smackdown

Charlotte’s status is up in the air, since she needs surgery to repair a breast implant (busted before Mania but being dealt with soon) and also got some teeth knocked out in Europe over the weekend. I can’t imagine they’d have had her qualify if she can’t compete, but maybe they have plans for something to get the IIconics in the match.

Seth Rollins is doing the Open Challenge thing with the Intercontinental Title

You know, the thing where he has long matches with deserving or undeserving lower midcarders in the hopes of elevating them despite beating them? This week was Mojo Rawley, so he was undeserving and it didn’t work, but what the hell.

War Raiders crushed Heavy Machinery

BOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

Ricochet and Velveteen Dream will be feuding

YAAAAAAAAAAAY

BONUS KUDOS

Bonus kudo to Corey Graves for calling Aiden English “Spider Jerusalem” on Smackdown.

Bunos kudo to Tommasso Ciampa for being the single purest, most hated heel in all of WWE right now. His match with Kassius Ohno was fine, but man, did he get booed.

Backlash (2018)

Right before things go bad for AJ.
Oh, hey, this has been sitting in drafts for like a week. I is good at bloggings.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you, WWE Backlash 2018. A largely mediocre pay per view, kicking off this year’s new era of co-branded PPV’s, but it is significant in one key aspect. My first ever 100% prediction PPV, including the pre-show.

Tuesday, May 8, 2018

Superhero Catch Up Post

OK, between getting sick and not caring, I’m a few eps behind on posting around the various hero shows. But nothing’s really changed. All three shows are sticking with their patterns.

Flash continues to be awful, with recent episodes really playing up the series’ frequent flirtations with awful gender dynamics and writing for women. There are ocasional flashes of not-awful in the righting, but they’re few and far between.

Arrow keeps trying to mine an awful season arc for the best stories it can tell under the circumstances, and sort of kind of succeeds but not really. I mean, yeah, OK< Human Target disguised as Tommy Merlynn is about the only way I’d accept the return of Merlynn, but didn’t Flash just have a show where someone impersonated a dead person to get the hero out of a trial?

Agents of SHIELD continues to be the standout, despite its clumsy attempts to pretend it’s still happening around the same time as Infinity War. The weird tragedy of Glen Talbot continues as he becomes Graviton and goes insane is a fun, unexpected (three episodes ago) twist, but mentioing “New York” last week and “Thanos” in this last episode is about to raise some questions I don’t think the show’s capable of answering to any degree of satisfaction.

Sunday, May 6, 2018

PREDICTIONS: Backlash 2018

Only two of these people are wrestling each other.
Right. The last couple of weeks have been boring as fuuuuuck. Some decent matches, but nothing really in the way of character development or plot moves. We’re still in the post-Mania storylines as we head for Backlash and the end of single-brand PPV events.

Sunday, April 22, 2018

The Flash: “Lose Yourself”

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO FLASH NO.
This week’s Flash suffers so hard in comparison to the Black Lightning season finale that it’s tough to judge it on its own merits.

Agents Of SHIELD: “The Honeymoon”

I am enjoying the “always together” runing bit.
Agents of SHIELD largely gets back on track with an episode that shifts the focus on Simmons’ and Yoyo’s beliefs about time travel from weird and obnoxious to underplayed and endearing.

Arrow: “Fundamentals”

The season would get better the farther back you revealed the dosing, you know.
Given how generally lousy and mediocre the main season plot, main season villains, and main season events have been, “Fundamentals” was surprisingly good.

Black Lightning: The Final Three

VILLAINY!
Man, that’s how you close out a series.

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wroundup (4/16-19)

Nobody in this promo image switched brands!
OK. A lot of people switched brands during the Superstar Shakeup, so many I couldn’t keep track and had to rely on news reports. I’ve broken everything down into chunks. And no, there really weren’t any other events of significance this week that need covering.

Thursday, April 12, 2018

The Flash: “Null And Annoyed”

Why must you test my love for Danny Trejo, Flash?
This week’s Flash was a bad hour of television with eight really good minutes in it.

Agents of SHIELD: “Inside Voices”

Thank goodness for fun character moments.
I’m not sure how comfortable I am with Agents of SHIELD’s embrace of future-vision predestination in the second half of the season.

Arrow: “The Thanatos Guild / Brothers In Arms”

“This is so out of character for John.” WE KNOW.
I finally realized why I’m enjoying this season of Arrow so little. The people involved are deliberately telling a story I don’t want and don’t care about.

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wroundup (4/9-4/11)

Hey, they called it the Eclipse right off the bat!
OK, the post-Mania week of shows is non-stop EVENTS OF SIGNIFICANCE< so I just need to plow through them.

Wednesday, April 11, 2018

Lesnar Vs. Reigns: The Coal In The Wrestlemania Stocking

Almost as many F5’s in the ring as there were beach balls in the crowd.
Tights And Fights, which is really the only wrestling podcast anyone needs even if Hal hates Lucha Underground, coined the term “Ice Cream Christmas” to describe what Wrestlemania should be. And I want to expand on the Christmas part of that to try and explain why Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns was such a disaster.

Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Wrestlemania 34

I didn’t realize I wanted this until it happened.
Fourteen matches. Six plus hours. It’s a test of faith and endurance, but maybe less so this year than most, with a card made up of matches that should, for the most part, deliver on paper.

Takeover: New Orleans

THAT GUY FLIPS JUST LIKE PRINCE PUMA!
Takeover New Orleans was a hell of a show. Long, too. Probably longer than it needed to be, honestly. But still excellent.

Saturday, April 7, 2018

PREDICTIONS: Wrestlemania 34

The card is fuckin’ stacked, no doubt about it.
Fourteen matches. Six plus hours. It’s a test of faith and endurance, but maybe less so this year than most, with a card made up of matches that should, for the most part, deliver on paper.

PREDICTIONS: NXT Takeover: New Orleans

He’ll alwasy be Prince Puma to me.
The Takeover before Mania is tonight, and while I won’t get to watch it until tomorrow, I’m very excited for the show overall, and two of the matches in particular. Not that I’m confident with predictions at all.

Friday, April 6, 2018

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wroundup (Pre-Mania Lull Edition)

BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS!
To be fair, if any Events Of Significance did happen the week of Wrestlemania, people aren’t doing their jobs right. Still, slow week.

Monday, April 2, 2018

Agents of SHIELD: “Rise And Shine”

Kinda made my head hurt too.
Sometimes, you think you know where a show is going, and then it swerves, and it’s a good thing. And sometimes it swerves and it’s a bad thing.

Black Lightning: “Sins Of The Father”

I like it when heroes do smart things.
There’s a moment in last week’s Black Lightning that made me very happy.

Friday, March 30, 2018

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wroundup (Mar 26-28)

How To Improve A US Title Match 101 
 With most Wrestlemania things settled, not a ton of EVENTS OF SIGNIFIcANCE for the week.But a few things happened.

Thursday, March 29, 2018

Agents of SHIELD: “The Devil Complex”

GUTPUNCH.
When you need someone to make a superhero show trope work btetter than anyone else can do it, you turn to Agents of SHIELD.

Runaways: “Doomsday / Hostile”

Charmingly homeless.
Well, at least I know how the big season finale didn’t get spoiled for me in the time it took me to watch it.

Sunday, March 25, 2018

Runaways: “Kingdom” through “Tsunami”

They’re just standing there AND doing something!
It took four hours to get there, but the protagonists of Runways finally started protagonizing.

Black Lightning: “The Book Of LIttle Black LIes”

THUNDER COSTUME!
Goddamn, this show is good.

Pacific Rim: Uprising

Fisting your fondness for the original.
No, seriously - save your fucking money. This movie is lukewarm garbage.

Friday, March 23, 2018

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wroundup (Mar 18-21)

Please, world, let me enjoy this without reservation.
Fairly mild week, as the road to Wrestlemania firms up beneath our tires. Oh, except for that one thing. The event of such significance that it dwarfs all other EVENTS OF SIGNIFICANCE.

Sunday, March 18, 2018

Runaways: “Fifteen”

Making things with 
The plot thicks...

Agents of SHIELD: “Principa”

Axe me again if I have a shotgun.
HOLY SHIT THAT DEKE REVEAL!

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wroundup (3/12-15)

Yeah, I don’t mind him going over at least half these schlubs.
I don’t know why, but this week’s wrestling really resonated with me and got me excited. Either the stuff they’re doing is working better, or turning 49 has somehow opened my cold, cynical heart up to wrestling. That means a lot of EVENTS OF SIGNIFICANCE.

Black LIghtning: “Revelations”

Loved the part where she actually tries to calibrate her super-strength.
Holy shit, a lot went down in an hour of Black Lightning.

The Flash: “Run, Iris, Run”

Why is her lighning purple? Who knows.
Oh, hey, Ralph had a crisis of faith again.

Wednesday, March 14, 2018

Agents Of SHIELD: “The Real Deal”

The show needed more Mike.
The only real problem I had with the 100th episode of Agents of SHIELD is that they started with a bunch of stuff they wanted to have in the episode and then worked backwards.

Arrow: “Doppleganger”

Mostly more fun than a phone book to the ribs.
Last week’s Arrow was the anti-Flash.

Fastlane 2018

HAPPY RUSEV DAY!
I have to say, I enjoyed the wrestling on Fastlane more than I expected to. Some weirdness, some questionable booking decisions, but except for the US Title Match, I enjoyed the matches. There was a pointless six-man tag on the kickoff show that I never had time to watch, but apparently Tye Dillinger pinned Mojo Rawley, and I’m always in favor of that.

Friday, March 9, 2018

PREDICTIONS: Fastlane (2018)

Sure do make you lose your mild.
“The last stop on the Road to Wrestlemania” is, as usual, more of a speed bump. For the most part, we know what the Wrestlemania plans are, and the odds of Fastlane changing that are slim to none.

Black LIghtning: “Equinox: The Book Of Fate”

Gone too soon, methinks.
WAIT, WHAT?

The Flash: “Enter Flashtime”

Speedster Party!
This week’s Flash is evidence that not every show needs or should have season-long fights against a single, overarching villain.

Agents of SHIELD: “All The Comforts Of Home”

EVIL MILLENIAL (who’s too young to be an actual millenial probably)
Nicely done, Agents of SHIELD.

Weekly Wrasslin’ Wrounup (Mar 5-7)

Theyre really making Asuka a star. 
It’s the go-home week for Fastlane, and Smackdown is once again two hours of mostly useless garbage with decent but meaningless wrestling. EVENTS OF SIGNIFICANCE: