Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Rocket League: Rumble Mode

Good, but not as good as... you know.
We've been playing Rocket League since it came out, and we're still playing it. Local splitscreen only, and infrequently, so none of us are particularly good at it, but who cares? It's a shit-ton of fun, and with all of us within a narrow range of abilities, matches are competitive, insane, and fun as fuuuuuuuck.

And now we have Rumble Mode. It dropped last week, and the weekly gaming crew gave it its first tryout yesterday. I'm sure we'll play the regular mode again someday, but I'm not sure why we will, because BOOST DIARRHEA.

See, Rumble Mode has powerups, Every ten seconds, you get one at random. You fire it off, and the ten second counter starts again. For example, you can freeze the ball in place. You can pull the ball towards you two different ways. You can pull yourself towards the ball. You can hit with extra force, you can stick the ball to your car with spikes, you can swap places with your opponent. You can create a tornado, punch the ball, kick an opponent, swap places with another player, or use what Rocket League demurely calls the "Disruptor". But what it actually does is give your target opponent BOOST DIARRHEA.

They immediately start megaboosting. Uncontrollably. Unstoppably. They pour boost out of their backsides like they ate out of the trash at Taco Bell. Whatever they thought they were doing, they're not doing it anymore. It is the absolute best because it is the absolute worst. Oh, you can score very easily if you get the spikes. You can tactically employ the swapper, you can line up a perfect shot to punch the ball into the goal with a giant springloaded boxing glove, but nothing, NOTHING, is as satisfying as giving someone boost diarrhea, because nothing is as satisfying as the sound someone makes when you hit them with it. And this is not a game sound I'm talking about. It's a room sound, which is the best kind of game sound. The sound of pain and despair coming from the mouth of the person sitting next to you.

Oh, and there's also a new Octagon map, which is fine, I guess, though the bounce patterns on the arena are fucking perverse and weird.


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