EVEN MORE WRESTLERS: FTR

The most exciting boring team in all of wrestling!Yes, it’s Bash Wheelhard and Crax Woodwind, FTR! You may remember them from their WWE run as The Revival, when they were Wild Dasher and Steve.

I kid, mostly. But it is true that for the entirety of the time I’ve known them, what their names are, and which name goes with FTR Bald and which name goes with FTR Hair, slides off my brain like butteret Teflon. And I like them!

But they do live entirely in the category of wrestlers who’s gimmick is “we’re wrestlers”. They put on trunks, they put on boots, and they wrestle. They’re very good at it, and can absolutely give a Shatter Machine to Max Caster, but Max Caster has a character. I know which one of the Acclaimed is Max Caster and which one is Anthony Bowens. FTR are only distinctive in the ring.

So I waited until their second pair of figures got cheap. Because you need an FTR. Because FTR wrestles EVERYBODY. I need them to wrestle with my Briscoes. I have the dog collars for fuck’s sake. But they’re not exciting.

For not exciting dues, the figures are fine. They both have two heads and some hands. One of them (Hair) has an arm sheath thingy, and Bald has a knee brace. And they both have trunks that say FTR on them. They’re like a 5 on the effort scale, but I don’t know what an 8 on the effort scale FTR would look like?

Anyway, I spent half an hour trying to get this Shatter Machine set up properly vertical in the photo box with ZERO success, gave up, shot it lying on the green cardboard, and found the angle that fit best. Made sure to use the red ropes and the Collision apron since that’s where they spend most of their time and that’s the kind of detail you expect from me.